Standing at His Wedding

Seeing Jake again after five years was at Ashley's wedding.

He was the groom. I was a bridesmaid.

Ashley, glowing and giddy, pulled me aside to gush about their love story.

"I'm the one who pulled him out of that car wreck, you know? He had some fiancée back then, but I got him airlifted out of the country that same night for treatment. How's that for a power move?"

She kept talking, but I couldn't hear a word—just a high-pitched ringing in my ears.

Five years. Almost two thousand damn days. And the man I loved most had been hidden from me… by my best friend?

I doubled over, gasping, my whole body trembling like a leaf.

Ashley noticed how pale I'd gone and quickly guided me into the bridal suite.

"Hey," she said, voice full of concern, "are you okay? Is your depression acting up again?"

All those years… I'd searched for Jake everywhere. Asked everyone. Put up missing posters. Paid for social media campaigns. Even his family gave up. But I never did.

So many nights I stood by the roadside, ready to let go. Ready to end it.

And now? It all felt like one sick joke.

I stared at the faded, crisscrossed scars on my right wrist. My eyes burned. My heart felt like it was being torn right out of my chest.

Ashley sighed. "Are you thinking about your fiancé again? You've gotta stop looking. It's been too long. He's probably… gone." She paused, then added lightly, "I'll set you up with one of Jake's friends soon."

Just then, Jake walked in. He looked sharp in his black tux—exactly like the man I remembered.

Our eyes met. But he just glanced my way, then turned to straighten Ashley's dress.

His groomsmen trailed behind him—all old friends. Most of them knew me. They looked like they wanted to say something, but no one did.

Maybe if this were a movie, I could tell myself he had amnesia. That he didn't remember me.

But his friends' guilty faces told another story.

He remembered everything.

He just didn't love me anymore.

"Honey," Ashley chirped, "tell your friends to stick around tonight, okay? Let's have some fun!" She winked at me.

Jake just nodded. Didn't even look my way.

Like I was a stranger.

I closed my eyes slowly. My heart squeezed tight—like a fist thrown into fire.

I'd never felt pain like this. I had to let it out.

I stumbled into the bathroom and slammed my head against the wall. Once. Twice. The impact made my vision blur. Blood trickled down my temple.

I braced myself against the wall, sharp pain shooting through my skull.

I hit my head again. And again. It was the only thing that made the ache inside feel quieter.

It hurt so much.

I curled up on the floor, heart pounding, and then… I laughed. A broken, hollow sound.

"Jake… you don't want me anymore."

By the time I walked out, the ceremony had started.

Ashley had asked someone else to stand in as bridesmaid. I didn't blame her.

I stood at the back, watching Ashley beam as she said "I do."

Jake got down on one knee and slid the ring onto her finger.

A wave of jealousy—raw and violent—washed over me.