The Goodbye List

I applied for euthanasia on December 25th.

Then made a countdown to my death.

“What is this for?” my fiance asked me.

‘For you two cheaters to death too.’ I answered in my heart.

------

"Miss Evans, this is Dignitas Switzerland. Are you the one who applied for euthanasia on December 25th?"

Amelia's eyelashes fluttered slightly. Her voice was calm. "Yes."

"Very well. Your application has been approved. You have two weeks to get your affairs in order."

The call ended just as the bedroom door opened.

Sebastian walked in, bringing a chill from outside. He smiled and held up an exquisitely wrapped gift box. "Amelia, happy birthday."

Amelia gave a faint smile. "My birthday was yesterday."

Sebastian froze. A flicker of panic and embarrassment crossed his face.

"Sorry, work has been hectic lately."

He knelt down and began massaging her calves, deftly changing the subject. "How are you feeling today? Any discomfort in your legs?"

His slender hands reddened from the pressure, veins bulging prominently on their backs.

His technique was professional, his pressure perfect. Yet Amelia felt nothing.

When she didn't respond, Sebastian looked up. Before he could speak, his phone buzzed.

He pulled it out and glanced at the screen. An involuntary smile of delight spread across his face.

All unspoken words forgotten, he stood abruptly. "Amelia, I need to handle something for work. I'll come back to massage you later."

He walked straight to his study without looking back.

Amelia remained silent, watching him leave.

Long after he disappeared, the memory of his unrestrained smile replayed vividly in her mind.

Would a work matter make him smile like that?

That kind of genuine happiness only appeared when facing someone you loved.

After all, she had seen that smile many times before.

Every morning in high school, she would hurriedly finish her milk and rush downstairs. There he would be, smiling as he walked over to take her heavy backpack and drive them to school.

They were both eighteen then, youthful and bright-eyed, seeing only each other.

Growing up together, they followed the classic storyline of childhood friends developing feelings.

They secretly dated behind their parents' and school's backs, vowing to get into the same university and go public with their relationship.

They pushed each other to study, excelled together, and both scored nearly perfect on their SATs to get into Stanford.

That should have been their happy ending.

But then the accident happened.

The day before freshman orientation, a car crashed toward them. Amelia shoved Sebastian out of the way without hesitation.

That day, Sebastian walked away unscathed. She lost the use of her legs.

Misfortune never comes alone. That same year, her parents died in a plane crash. Unable to cope with the tragedies, she fell into depression.

Heartbroken, Sebastian proposed to her right after graduation.

He vowed he would never let her down.

For three years of marriage, he kept that promise.

Until two weeks ago, when she found his journal.

The man who professed his love daily was secretly pouring out his anguish on those pages.

He wrote that he proposed out of moral obligation. He feared everyone would condemn him if he didn't.

He said coming home felt suffocating. Every moment with her was torture.

He wished she had never saved him. He would rather be the one in the wheelchair than bear this crushing guilt.

He confessed he had fallen for another woman behind her back—Sophia Anderson. She was vibrant, radiant, and sunny, just like Amelia before the accident.

The next day, Sophia texted her.

"Amelia, Sebastian told me you'll never walk again. Since you've known each other so long, why don't you let him go?"

"Did you know he's miserable because of you? He wishes he were dead. But he can't die—he has to put on a happy face and take care of you. What a pathetic life."

"If he hadn't met me, he might have lost his mind. Don't you feel any guilt? I ache for him. He loves me now. Please stop clinging to him. Divorce him. Let us be happy."

Then she sent over a dozen intimate photos.

Every picture featured Sebastian.

He smiled while brewing coffee, then leaned in to flash a peace sign when Sophia took a selfie.

He peeled a whole plate of shrimp for her, wiping sauce from her fingers.

He walked in her footprints on the beach, gleefully offering her a handful of seashells.

With each photo, Amelia's heart shattered as if sliced by a thousand blades.